17th September 2017

I need you... i need your hug... your touch... your kiss... i need you to need me... 😔😔

16th September 2017

Dreamt of you... this time not really a pleasant dream... how i wish reality is really the opposite from dream... so something pleasant will happen between the 2 of us...

13th September 2017

Hoping... someday you will walk into my life and shine it all up again... it is just black and white now... all i need is for you to love me... i'm crumbling... really dont know how long i can hold before i lose myself away...

If i fight for you... will you fight for me...

12th September 2017

Been having sleepless nights nowadays... getting kore and more difficult to make myself fall asleep... knowing in my head... i am thinking about you... it seems like... i can never let it go... never... a part of me just keep on holding onto you... i miss you... i really miss you... i need your hug so much... my heart is crying out and you cannot hear it... you would not care either... i am still suffering deeply in pain... can you see... you cant... all you see is that you think i am doing fine without you... i am listening to rumours about you... all your self assumptions... when you're all wrong... i am here alone... believing in you... having faith in you... holding on to hope... while hanging on the edge of a cliff for as long as i can to keep myself alive till the end... really hope you can learn to see things from my perspective instead... i need to be selfish too... to protect myself okay... you want me to understand your situation... but who is going to understand mine... who is going to protect my feelings... nobody... in hope you will but you left... left me stranded... i guess... i will close my bottle and never open it up again anymore... back to keeping everything to myself... thanks...

6th September 2017

6th September 2017... yet another monthsary... but so different now... cannot celebrate it anymore... everything happened so fast... changed so fast... and fell and got hurt all in an instance... how i wish we could go back to how we used to be... happy together... haiz... i really miss you... and i will never believe what people say about you... until i see it for myself... i will always believe and have faith in you... hope you know that...

1st September 2017

Got to see you after weeks... although it was just a normal look or quick glance... i am glad already... how i wish i could be able to look at you and just stare into your eyes like before again...

30th August 2017

01:19am... here i am... unable to sleep and tearing... missing her...

30th August 2017

It just feel like my heart gets a cut from a knife for each day that passed without you... doubt i can survive this pain...

30th August 2017

Out of a sudden while otw home just now... heart felt damn fucking heavy... missing her so fuckong much... started tearing while walking back home... decided to take a walk at the park cos didnt want to go home while tearing... all the chinese songs out of a sudden just fitted my mood and tells it all about what i feel and think... the more the songs continued play... i more i teared... while thinking about her and missing her... haiz...

29th August 2017

Been 3 weeks... only 3 weeks and so much has changed and happened... what am i gonna do with my life... i miss her...

28th August 2017

Congrats on getting accepted by EAE... feeling happy for you... now that you have no more burden like me to carry... hope you will continue to jiayou and study hard for your Os...

28th August 2017

Everything reminds me of you... i just cannot stop thinking of you... i miss you... i really fucking miss you... i need your hug so much... and it fucking hurts knowing that i can never get your hug again... fml... really fml...

27th August 2017

You totally killed me inside out babe... you broke every single promise you made... you contradict everything you said with your actions... you said you wont but you do it... you said you will but you did not... your actions just show that you've never really love me... you show no remorsefulness... haiz... i love you...

27th August 2017

Dreamt of you thrice this week... sigh... we were so sweet in my dreams... you even asked me "come back to me please"... knowing it all will not happen in reality...

27th August 2017

Hard earned streak... gone... 448... you just keep giving me the feel that you dont even want to be friends and work our way up again... what a dirty way of leaving... you really need to reflect on yourself... i love you... but there are things you always think you're right but you're wrong...

26th August 2017

I am just a failure in relationship... nobody... nobody can just love me and stay in life... am a fucking failure in everything... people i love just always leave me... people just love to throw my heart around and shatter it...

26th August 2017

Haizz.... just want her to know that she can never find someone who will love her like me...

26th August 2017

So... she indirectly initiated a break up... what a way... so noy clean... through text?... I really love you... but your actions really contradicts your words... i really hope you reflect on yourself... i know where i went wrong but you just dont think you did any wrong that contributed to the situation we are in now... you say you feel pain... i dont understand how you feel pain when you're the one leaving and said your feeling faded... you dont even know if you love me... how does when you has no feeling and dont know if you love me, choosing to leave made you feel pain... i really dont understand... and i am here... just here listening and watching to your contradicting words and actions while the knife just stab deeper and deeper into my heart... dont tell me i dont understand because i understand the pain more dhen you... more dhen you thought... even if you understand the pain but so what...  you're not feeling the pain now.... and i am feeling it now... and all you do was... unfriend me?... and telling me things?... really hope you act and solve things maturely if you want to convince me you actually understand... if not... you dont... taking a break to us it to break up is already a dirty act... sigh... i gave you all i could... and you just re-enacted my past again and smash everything i gave you... my love for you... my heart.... my trust and faith in you... everything... you smashed everything... instead of solving it... you chose to ignore it and walk away... please mature up and self reflect... put your ego and pride away... it wont help you solve things maturely at all... i really hope we could work our way up again... and one day... back together again... i really love you... baby...

25th August 2017

She removed me as friend on snapchat... idky... reallt want to know why... it just bring me to tears... she still doesnt know i am living through pain everyday...

21st August 2017

It has been 2 weeks... I really really miss you baby... idk about you... I have been trying so hard to suppress my need to check on you...