3rd June 2017

Got so worried after finding out baby slept so late... and only got 3 hours of sleep. Really wanted her to get enough rest... she seemed like not wanting to talk to me... told her that she dont seem like she want to talk to me and she replied no... and i told her i want her to keep talking to me... she replied fineeeee. Told her that, by that reply means she didnt want to talk to me? And she changed subject... it really hurts me... whenever i ask a question and she just ignore it... i am really scared.... really really scared... she give me a feel that she've lost interest in me... all her replies was so cold.... i am really sad but i just didnt show it... i really dont want to make her angry at me... keep the pain to myself and rather she is happy... i just really want her to show me that she really love me... i feel sucky as i know i always need reassurrance... i know i need to learn how to open up and let her have fun and try not to be sensitive... but i tried my best... there is this prick deep down in my heart that is always pricking me and it hurts... i need her to remove this prick for me.... i really love her... baby... i really love you... and i really miss her while she is having fun in the chalet... miss her so much that it actually hurts... its 12.21am now... and she have yet to reply me since 8pm... she must be really having fun... glad she did... never want her to see how sad i get whenever i get insecure and when i miss her... cos it only makes her angry... and when she is angry... she ignores me... which hurts... and might say things that hurt me even more... hope she never gets to see this blog and know how sad i get everytime...